Wednesday, June 15, 2011

Book Club Forum #16: Cheap Cabernet: A Friendship

Book Selection Status: READ

Month: June 2011
Genre: Non fiction Chic-Lit Memoir
Book of the Month: Cheap Cabernet: A Friendship
Author: Cathie Beck
Question source: http://www.cathiebeck.com/my-book/reading-group-guide/

Discussion Questions:

1. Why does Cathie feel the need to start a women’s group? What crossroads has she arrived at in her life? How does her children moving away from home change the way she feels about her place in society?


2. Cathie and Denise become fast friends, but their relationship is far from smooth, even at the beginning. In what ways do their personalities clash? In what ways do they complement one another? Why do you think their complex relationship ends up being so special?

3. Why does Cathie retell the story of applying for food stamps when her children are young? What does that story tell the reader about Cathie’s life as a young mother? What do we learn about her background, and how does it inform the woman we meet in the memoir?

4. Discuss issues of ownership as they are portrayed in the memoir (Cathie’s need to own a house, and Denise’s need to own garage sale bargains). What does owning material objects mean to each of the women? How do their different backgrounds inform this need?

5. Denise and John have unique and unconventional marriage. How does Cathie feel about their relationship? Do you think she envies them, or pities them? What about the marriage works for Denise, and in what ways does the arrangement fail her? Do you think John and Denise are in love? Why or why not?

6. Cathie had very complicated, mixed feelings about Denise’s illness. In what ways does Cathie let Denise’s MS affect their friendship? Would you say that Cathie takes care of Denise when she is ill? In what ways does Denise’s MS frustrate and disappoint Cathie?

7. Discuss Cathie and Denise’s trip to Jamaica and Cuba. In what ways is the trip a turning point for both women? What do they each discover about themselves on the trip and what do they discover about one another?

8. Why does Cathie include the story of her visit to New York to see where Denise grew up? What does visiting Denise’s home, and meeting the women she grew up with tell us about Denise and her upbringing? Why does meeting these women have such a profound effect on Cathie?

9. Toward the end of the memoir, Cathie writes about her own mother, and the struggles she faced raising Cathie and her siblings. Is Cathie anything like her mother? In what ways does Cathie escape her families’ legacy? In what ways does she continue where her mother left off? How does her family and her childhood haunt her into her adult life?

10. In the end, Cathie and Denise have a falling out and Cathie does not attend her friend’s memorial service. Do you think Denise orchestrated their rift to protect Cathie, as Cathie assumes? Do you think Cathie can really find closure?

11. Cheap Cabernet follows in a tradition of many great memoirs, novels, and movies about women’s friendships. How does this book fit in to that tradition? How is Cathie and Denise’s friendship unique from others you have read about or seen?

2 comments:

Tysheena said...

1. Cathie feels the need to start a women's group to find friends.

2. Cathie and Denise are like night and day; where as Cathie is more calm and calculated and Denise is robust and spontaneous. However, it's those very traits that cause the two women to find completion of what they were lacking.

3. Cathie tells this story to convey to her readers exactly how hard it was being a single mother. As for the other women in the memoir it serves as a catalyst of comfort to confide..

bikki said...

1. Cathie starts a group so she can find friends. Her children have left home and she is at the empty nest phase of life. She has more time, she is more secure and she is ready to be in a different place in life.

2. Denise and Cathie are very different - almost opposite in every way. One is more introverted, the other extroverted. One is more of a planner, the other spontaneous. The examples go on and on. I think their relationship works because the complement each other and have those characteristics that the other lacks. There are always those special people that you meet and have an impact on your life.

3. I can't remember specifically why she tells it, but it paints a picture for the reader about how difficult it was for Cathie as a single parent. What she struggled through and overcame.

4. I think owning material objects comforts each of the women in separate ways. It gives Cathie a sense of home to finally own her own residence. It is hers - not some transitory spot that she can't feel secure in. She has never really had a home and it is like a piece in a puzzle that was always missing.

5. I think in some ways Cathie envies the ease of the Denise's marriage with John, but she realizes that type of relationship wouldn't work for her. I think the marriage works for Denise because it allows her space, but she doesn't have the romance that she longs for from John. I think John and Denise have their own form of love - love takes many different forms and we don't know what works for other people.

6. I think Cathie isn't sure what to do for Denise and Denise isn't clear about her expectations with regards to the MS. I think Cathie does her best to take care of Denise as much as Denise will let her.

7. I just remember the trip being horrible and how I can imagine this happening to me on vacation with some people I know - I would be Cathie and it would not be good.